Create total column(s) (Like Excel's CountIF() )

Hey Power BIs,

I am very new to Power BI and come from Excel. Hi. I have been spending days trying to accomplish what would take me seconds to do in Excel - with zero progress.

I want to create total columns that summarize a long list of columns, counting the number of times a defined text string appears.

Like so:

It puzzles me that something so simple in Excel is seemingly almost impossible in Power BI / query. I must be wrong.

Surely, I'm missing a basic function. Please help!